Kelvin and I have been married a month now, and a
thousand things have been happening. A lot of people have been asking me
about the changes and discoveries of a newly married life. Well, do I have a
lot of stories for you!
First, let’s talk about the general stuff:
- · I am not a big fan of house chores, but because I’m a wife now, I have to do them
- · When I was still single, I would ask my brother to travel from Batangas to Manila just to clean my house. Now Kelvin and I clean the house. Kelvin’s territory is the terrace and restroom, and I take care of the bedrooms, living and dining room, and the kitchen.
- · When I was still single, I didn’t cook at home because I didn’t like the idea of cooking for myself, eating alone, and cleaning up after myself. So what I did is I just go to the office and ask my colleagues to eat with me at the pantry or any fast food/restaurant nearby. Now I wake up at 5 or 6 in the morning to prepare our breakfast, and lunch that we take to work. I now have someone to eat with at home, and Kelvin cleans up and washes the dishes while I take a shower. J I also realized that I like cooking! It was my first time to cook Chicken Curry, giniling, and all other dishes and Kelvin seemed to love all of them. I’m just happy some of Mama’s spectacular cooking skills have rubbed off on me. Now my daily thoughts as a wife is, “What should I prepare for breakfast/lunch/dinner later/tonight/tomorrow/the next day/ next week?” I’m also excited to try out some new dishes and surprise Kelvin with them.
- · Last year, when I needed my clothes washed, I take my clothes to the laundry shop, and some of them to my Mama and she washed my clothes for me. But because I’m married now, I do the laundry – well most of it is delegated to the laundry shop, but some of it I wash by hand. But because I haven’t washed a single piece of clothing in YEARS, when I first did the laundry, I ended up with nasty abrasions on my knuckles.
- · I am not neatest person (alright, fine, I am not neat at all) but now everytime I leave the house I have to make sure that everything is in its place and the bed is made so that when the husband and I come home, all tuckered out from work, we won’t be stressed out by the sight of our messy house.
Second, here are the things that I do/did that (sometimes)
drive Kelvin nuts:
- · He wasn’t very impressed with how I put our wedding gifts in the cabinet so he decided to rearrange them – which hurt my feelings;
- · He also wasn’t very happy with how I stacked the washed dishes in the dish rack so he rearranged them too; this time he asked me first
- · He didn’t like that my fried rice had big unpeeled garlic in them. He insisted that he was choking on them
- · He didn’t like that I left out one serving dish unwashed when I left for work. When I got home, I saw him sleeping on the couch and when I woke him up, he sleepily admonished me, “You didn’t wash the plate” – and that, again, hurt my feelings. I cleaned house and did the laundry before work, by the way
- · He wasn’t very happy that I forgot to take out the trash and decided to reprimand me the moment I woke up the next morning.
- · He was not happy that the china cabinet was blocking the fuse box. How in the world could I have moved that thing? What does he think of me, Wonderwoman?!
- · He asked me not to put hot water in one of our glasses because it might break. A few days later I did see one of our glasses with a crack on it. Whether it was the glass that I used, I am not quite certain.
- · (Again) Because I am not very neat nor organized, I’ve got a lot of stuff on the couch. Kelvin has politely asked me to remove my bags, clothes, make up, plastic bags, toiletries, pillows, bags of food, and what not off of it. I’ve got so much stuff on there! So much that you can’t see the couch anymore! Haha!
- · It takes me quite a long time to get ready so he decided that I should take a shower before he does because I still have to put my makeup and lotion on, go through about 3 outfits before I choose the final one and move my stuff into a different bag.
Third, these are the things that Kelvin did/does that (sometimes)
drive me crazy:
- · To take care of the pesky mosquitoes, Kelvin bought a bug spray and uses them at home. The thing is, after using it, he leaves it lying around in the house and I keep on putting it back in the cabinet only to find it again in another location the next day! I have lost count of the number of times I’ve seen that thing on the table, in the kitchen, and in the living room. The same goes for the bathroom cleaner!
- · Once Kelvin gets home, he leaves ALL of his stuff in the living room. That includes his shirts (the clean ones and the not-so-clean ones), socks, underwear, trash, and everything else. And not just the living room! He leaves them on the dining table too!
- · On our first weekend as a married couple, we bought tons of stuff for the house, including a toothbrush and toothpaste holder. So, can someone please tell me why Kelvin still leaves his toothbrush on the sink?
- · Kuya Manuel (a family friend and jack-of-all trades) installed a bolt lock on the door. So why doesn’t Kelvin use it?
- · Kelvin farts ALL THE TIME
- · Kelvin puts food in the fridge and he doesn’t cover it
- · Kelvin eats cold pizza
- · Kelvin drank ALL of our wine
- · He uses the serving dish for the rice as his own plate so that he doesn’t have to wash ONE extra plate
As much as he drives me crazy, he still does a lot of
things that make me go, “Aww…”. So for the last list, here are the things that
I love about The Husband:
- · When he leaves the house before I do, he makes the bed so that when I come home, I have a nice neat bed to lay my tired body on.
- · He pulls his own weight with the chores by taking care of the garage, restroom, dishes, the trash, and tidying up the house.
- · He always tells me that he doesn’t want me doing too many things at home and he doesn’t want me to tire myself out.
- · I have been sick for a number days and my asthma is acting up especially in the middle of the night. When I suffer from coughing fits in the middle of the night, Kelvin would wake right up, hand me some water and my inhaler, and tap my back. He’d then wait for my coughing fits to settle down and then he hugs me back to sleep.
- · Before bed, he sets up my nebulizer, and makes me use it so that I don’t cough as much at night.
- · When we wake up in the morning, he makes sure that I take my use my maintenance inhaler (yes, I have two inhalers) and take my vitamins.
- · Every morning Kelvin makes sure that there’s water in the restroom for my bath.
- · Even when I work late, he waits for me either outside the office at Starbucks, or at home. He waits for me to get home even if it’s almost midnight just so we can have dinner together.
- · He takes his provider role very seriously. As soon as he gets his salary, he gives all of it to me so that I can pay our bills and buy the things that we need
- · He goes with me to the grocery store to shop for groceries and carries ALL of them home.
- · One night I was craving for ice cream and I couldn’t sleep, he took me to the grocery store at 1am just so I could buy my ice cream.
- · He lets me buy the things that I THINK we need for the house.
- · He takes me to Resort World and buys me ice cream crepe. J
- · He still texts me everyday when he gets to the office, during his lunch break, and before he travels home from work. He still asks me if I have eaten and asks me how I am in the middle of the day.
Aww!
So there you go, folks! I told you a thousand things
have happened.
What have I learned in a month?
Marriage is indeed tricky with a union of two
individuals with pretty strong personalities. Kelvin is his parents’ firstborn
and he’s used to making decisions, and lived with his family for 28 years;
while I am the youngest in my family, I hate taking orders because I usually
make the decisions, and I am used to doing things my way without anyone telling
me what to do because I’ve lived on my own for more than 8 years. This means
that we usually butt heads especially when we don’t agree on things and I refuse
to do the things he asks me to do (which usually annoys the hell out of him).
It’s a good thing that Kelvin and I have agreed, years
and years ago, to be really open to each other and tell each other what we
think, what we like, dislike, and all other things. In our first month
together, every time we find something that we do not like about each other or
what the other person has done, we immediately and politely tell each other.
This is so that we don’t get offended, and think of ways on how we can change
whatever it is we need to change.
In the beginning it was difficult. I took offense and
got upset when he said something about the things I’ve done. I felt like I wasn’t
doing a good job as a wife, and that somehow I failed. But then I realized (and
he also told me) that whenever Kelvin comments about the house, he doesn’t do
it because he’s complaining or criticizing me. It’s just that; a
comment. He is just telling me what he wants so that I can think about it,
compare it to what I want, and come up with a solution that we both can
mutually benefit from.
But then on top of everything, even after all the
fights, disagreement, tears, cleaning, washing, cooking, lack of sleep, and all
other things; I can still say that marriage is spectacular. I wouldn’t trade it
for the world. I can say that getting married, or marrying Kelvin, that is – is
one of the best decisions I have ever made in my life. We have a lot of
differences but those differences are actually what make our marriage work. I
am not looking forward to our inevitable fights in the future but I sure am
excited for the “kiss and make up” moments. If you know what I mean. *wink
wink*
#KelandLeng2015
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Wedding Blog: http://www.kelvinandleng2015.blogspot.com/
My life's blog: http://www.sentimentsofleng.blogspot.com/
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